When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul.
Ps. 94:19

WHEN: Not “if” my anxious thoughts multiply, but when they multiply.

In other words, it is going to happen. Is this a warning or a promise or both? Lord, this is so true in my life, in every person’s life I am sure, but I’m looking at myself-at Anabel. Physical addictions, licentiousness, habitual overeating-things such as these have never been a struggle for me. I have had to face one obstacle throughout my committed Christian life: anxious thoughts. Thoughts dealing with my performance and the performance of others. Anxiously analyzing my performance, my relationships with You, my husband, my children, my friends-even with casual acquaintances. Trying to handle situations beyond my control that I feel like I should try to control. Unrealistic expectations from those around me. Constantly evaluating the gathering and being super sensitive to the feelings that come out of others and hit my sensitivity wavelengths. Bringing about peace; releasing group tension; being sure everyone is happy. Anxious thoughts. Oh, Lord, what stress this has brought into my life and everyone whose life I touch.

MY ANXIOUS THOUGHTS:
Anxious: worried, causing anxiety, eagerly wishing
Anxiety: worry or uneasiness about what may happen; a painful state of mind

Anxious thoughts bring about an emotional state of anxiety. That emotional state will affect my whole body, my ability to interact with the people around me and with You, Lord; to perform the most simple tasks; physical symptoms such as skin rashes, headaches, stomach upsets, being lethargic, or constant emotional upheaval.

What are my “anxious thoughts” about? Uncertainties in my life or in the lives of my loved ones. Concentrating on their circumstances instead of evaluating their character.

Uncertainties: not certain; not sure, certain in knowledge; doubtful, vague, not dependable or reliable, varying

I am uncertain. Nothing is uncertain with God. What God plans will come to pass. God has all knowledge. There is nothing doubtful about God or with God. There is nothing vague about God or with God. I can depend on God, He is reliable. God does not change. He does not vary.

MUTIPLY WITHIN ME:
These anxious thoughts are served up to my mind by the power of sin. Accepting the thought isn’t a prerequisite for more thoughts appearing on my horizon. Satan just starts throwing them at me, one after the other. He bombards me with his “anxious” thoughts! The key to stopping the thoughts is to set my mind on something else. What?

YOUR CONSOLATIONS:
Consolations: comforting thoughts; thoughts designed to make me feel less sad or disappointed; to bring about comfort, ease pain, clarify thinking, defeat depression.
Your consolations are available to me. Why, oh why, do I not take advantage of this? Jesus tries so hard to make my life pleasant-not because of the circumstances in my life, but because of His presence in my life-His promises-His ability to carry out these promises.

DELIGHT MY SOUL:
My soul: my mind, my will, and my emotions
Delight: to give great pleasure; to be highly pleased; rejoice

Well, Lord, it seems that the choice is mine. I can keep on receiving or listening to the anxious thoughts, or I can force my mind to dwell on Your consolations. If I keep listening to the Deceiver’s thoughts, anxiety will come and my emotions will be screaming out at me for relief. Results? Moods. Manipulation. Self-pity. Lethargy. Withdrawn. Depression. Tears. Throwing open the door of the cave where my emotions hide and letting them fly out to hit the people around me.

What a battle it is to “stay my mind on You” and Your consolations, but this is my only route to release and relief when the anxious thoughts come. I have lost so many battles-war-weary, sad, emotionally unstrung, accepting the defeating, destructive thoughts that come from Satan, Your enemy and mine.

I simply MUST refuse these thoughts. The thoughts may be true and the circumstances may be very difficult, and I am uncertain about the outcome, but God is my God. He knows what I need before I even ask Him. He has the situation under control. There are no uncertainties with Him.

So I sing. I quote rote scriptures because my thinking processes are not capable of labor just now. I reach out to others. I work. I whistle. I need to retreat and let my emotions settle down just a bit. I dig around in the depths of my heart and find the joy there that cannot be destroyed. I reach up to Him. I smile. I try to stand firm with my “no.”

God, I have given myself and my loved ones to You. I am persuaded that You are able to keep those things that I have entrusted into Your keeping until that time when the powers of evil will be destroyed; when my loved ones will be safe and secure and all difficulties will be finished. Until then, You know better what I need and what they need than I do. Lord, send what we need: sunshine, wind, rain, frost, or fruit; tempest, storms, tragedy, or tranquillity. You have made us and You know. When my anxious thoughts multiply within me,
Your consolations delight my soul.

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